Finding the right therapist can feel surprisingly difficult. If you are trying to figure out how to choose a therapist, you may find yourself comparing degrees, credentials, specialties, treatment approaches, years of experience, and dozens of therapist profiles that all seem to say roughly the same thing. While training and competence certainly matter, the letters after a therapist’s name may tell you much less about whether that person will actually be the right therapist for you than you might expect.
A therapist with a doctoral degree is not automatically a better therapist than a clinician with a master’s degree. There are phenomenal clinicians at both levels of training and clinicians at both levels who may not be a good fit for a particular person.
What matters more is whether the therapist has an appropriate treatment approach for the problems you are experiencing, whether there is a clear rationale behind that treatment, and whether the therapist communicates in a way that resonates with you.
What Should I Look for When Choosing a Therapist?
Start by looking at what the therapist says about the people they work with and how they approach therapy.
Most therapist websites will describe the types of concerns they treat. Does the therapist regularly work with people experiencing the problem that brought you to therapy? Do they describe the kinds of difficulties you are experiencing in a way that feels accurate?
Then look at how they describe treatment. Some therapists provide a clear explanation of how they work and what therapy with them might actually look like. Others list a long string of therapy acronyms without explaining what any of them mean.
You do not need to become an expert in psychotherapy modalities before choosing a therapist. However, the therapist should be able to explain how they work and why that approach makes sense for your concerns.
That becomes especially important because not every treatment approach is equally appropriate for every problem or every person.
Does It Matter What Type of Therapy My Therapist Uses?
Yes, although figuring out which type of therapy is right for you can be difficult without professional guidance.
Different therapy approaches emphasize different mechanisms of change. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), for example, often focuses on relationships among thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) places greater emphasis on psychological flexibility, acceptance, values, and changing a person’s relationship with difficult internal experiences.
Neither approach is inherently better. The question is whether a particular approach makes sense for the person, the problem, and the goals of treatment.
Evidence-based treatment guidelines also differ depending on the condition being treated. The APA clinical practice guidelines maintain clinical practice guidelines and professional resources describing psychological treatments for a number of mental health conditions.
This is one reason a comprehensive psychological evaluation can sometimes be particularly useful. A good evaluation does more than provide a diagnosis. It can identify strengths and weaknesses, clarify what appears to be driving a person’s difficulties, and provide specific treatment recommendations based on that person’s clinical presentation.
Without that information, a person may have to do more trial and error—and that is okay too.
How Can I Choose a Therapist If I Don’t Know Which Type of Therapy I Need?
Pay attention to how therapists communicate. Read their website. Look beyond the list of diagnoses and therapy modalities and pay attention to how they explain things.
Does their explanation make sense to you? Does their approach sound like something you could engage with? Does the way they talk about people and their problems resonate with you?
Then pay attention to the same things when you meet them.
You do not need to walk out of your first appointment thinking, “This is my person.” Meeting a stranger and immediately telling that person deeply personal things is inherently a little strange. Feeling awkward, nervous, guarded, or uncomfortable during an initial therapy appointment does not necessarily mean the therapist is a poor fit.
The more useful question may be whether there is enough there to make you willing to continue building the relationship.
How Important Is It to Like Your Therapist?
The relationship between a therapist and the person receiving therapy matters. A large body of psychotherapy research has found an association between the therapeutic alliance—the collaborative relationship between a therapist and the person receiving treatment—and treatment outcomes.
But a good therapeutic relationship is not necessarily the same thing as simply liking your therapist. A therapist may occasionally challenge you. Therapy may bring up emotions you would rather avoid. You might leave a productive session feeling uncomfortable because you talked about something painful or recognized something about yourself that was difficult to acknowledge.
The goal is not for therapy to always feel comfortable. Instead, consider whether you feel respected and understood. Does the therapist seem genuinely interested in understanding your experience? Can you follow what they are saying? Do their observations resonate with you? Do you feel increasingly able to be honest with them?
Those questions may tell you more about fit than whether the first session felt easy.
What If I Feel Uncomfortable With My Therapist?
Talk about it.
It can be tempting to interpret discomfort as evidence that the therapist is not right for you, but the discomfort itself may contain useful information.
Perhaps you are uncomfortable because you have never talked about these experiences with anyone. Maybe being vulnerable feels unsafe. Maybe you are worried the therapist will judge you. Perhaps the therapist said something that genuinely bothered you.
Those are very different situations. Rather than trying to determine the answer alone, consider telling the therapist what is happening.
That might sound as simple as, “I notice that I’m having a really hard time opening up here,” or, “Something about what you said last week didn’t sit right with me.”
A good therapist should be able to have a conversation about what is happening in the therapeutic relationship rather than becoming defensive or dismissing your concerns.
Research on therapeutic alliance also suggests that addressing ruptures or strains in the therapeutic relationship can be an important part of treatment.
What Are Red Flags in a Therapist?
One potential concern is a therapist who cannot give you any meaningful explanation for how treatment is supposed to help.
That does not mean a therapist needs to predict exactly how many sessions you will need or provide a rigid week-by-week treatment plan. Therapy is rarely that predictable.
But there should be some rationale behind what is happening. If you ask, “What are we working on?” or “How is this supposed to help with the problem I came in for?” the therapist should be able to give you an understandable answer.
Professional boundaries matter too. The American Psychological Association’s ethics code addresses issues such as multiple relationships, conflicts of interest, sexual relationships, confidentiality, informed consent, and practicing within areas of competence.
APA Ethical Principles of Psychologists and Code of Conduct
Not every therapist is a psychologist, so the specific professional code governing a therapist will depend on their license. But appropriate boundaries and ethical conduct should be expected regardless of discipline.
Should My Therapist Give Me Advice?
Therapy is usually more complicated than having an expert tell you what to do. A therapist can help you identify patterns, learn skills, consider perspectives you may not have considered, understand the consequences of different choices, and clarify what matters to you.
But ultimately, you have to live your life. Be cautious about confusing a therapist who confidently tells you what decisions to make with a therapist who is particularly effective. A good therapist can help you make more informed and intentional decisions without assuming that they know better than you what your life should look like.
How Do I Know If Therapy Is Working?
Look for changes outside the therapy room.
Those changes may be directly related to the reason you sought therapy. Someone who began therapy because of frequent conflict with a partner might notice that arguments are becoming less intense. Someone seeking treatment for anxiety might still experience anxiety but become better able to tolerate it without reorganizing their entire life around avoiding it.
Progress can also be subtle. Perhaps you recognize a pattern sooner. You communicate something instead of suppressing it. You recover from a difficult emotion more quickly. You set a boundary that previously felt impossible.
The therapist should also have some understanding of what you are trying to change and be willing to talk openly about whether treatment appears to be moving in that direction.
How Long Should I Give a New Therapist?
There is no magic number of sessions that applies to everyone.
Advice online sometimes suggests giving a therapist a particular number of appointments before making a decision, but fit and treatment response are too individual for a universal rule to be especially useful.
One session may be too soon to judge a therapist simply because you felt awkward or guarded. On the other hand, there is no reason to force yourself through a predetermined number of sessions when there are serious boundary concerns or it is already clear that the therapist does not have the expertise needed to treat your problem.
If you are uncertain, one of the best things you can do is discuss it directly with your therapist. Explain what isn’t working. Ask whether the therapist sees the problem differently. Ask what they think should change.
Then pay attention to what happens. If you have clearly communicated that something about therapy is not working for you and nothing changes—or the therapist is unwilling to meaningfully engage with the concern—it may be reasonable to consider finding someone else.
Is It Okay to Switch Therapists?
Yes. Ending therapy with one clinician does not mean the therapist is necessarily bad at their job, and it does not mean you failed at therapy.
Sometimes the fit simply isn’t right. A therapist may be excellent at what they do but not have the expertise you need. Their communication style may not resonate with you. Their treatment approach may not be appropriate for your concerns. Or you may have discussed problems with treatment and found that things still are not improving.
At that point, trying another therapist may make more sense than continuing indefinitely simply because you have already invested time in the relationship.
Finding the right therapist is not about finding the person with the most impressive credentials or the longest list of treatment modalities. It is about finding a competent clinician with an appropriate approach who can explain what you are working toward, communicate in a way that makes sense to you, and build a relationship in which you can do difficult work.
Looking for a Therapist in Salt Lake City?
Utah Center for Psychological Services provides individual therapy in Salt Lake City, Utah, for people experiencing a range of emotional, behavioral, and relationship concerns.
Finding the right therapist involves more than matching a diagnosis with a provider. Treatment approach, communication style, clinical expertise, and the therapeutic relationship can all matter. Our goal is to help connect each person with a clinician whose experience and approach are appropriate for their concerns and treatment goals.
Learn more about therapy services at Utah Center for Psychological Services.
